We Need to Talk about THE WEATHER

I'd hate being someone who constantly talks about the weather, but thing is, WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THE WEATHER, guys. Seriously.

Like this seriously:

Because something's really off here. 

It's the 18th of July and I can't help but notice that I'm wearing the same clothes I was wearing on the 18th of March. (Not the EXACT same clothes, but you get the point.) As I look out of my window right now I see a chimney smoking. WTF? And, no, it's not an industrial chimney, it's just a regular house with people living in them who just happen to feel cold in July.

I don't know why meteorologists always complain about how difficult it is to predict the weather. I found it surprisingly easy to do and I even managed to present the results in an exceptionally artistic way.  

That is the sad truth, and I can only assume that somebody forgot to push the summer button for Brussels, and when Belgians were told that there would be no summer this year, they were like 'whatever' and they just went on living their lives. Maybe the person responsible for pushing the button was Flemish, and the word 'summer' was indicated on the button in French only, so he refused to do it because, obviously, a man's got to have principles.

Sometimes, things can get really complicated in this city.

Anyways, good news is that with summer being officially cancelled in Brussels, I don't need to spend money on the following things: suncream, sunhat, sunglasses, sundress or anything else starting with 'sun'.

Which is a good thing because I need money to buy vitamin D in bulk.

Ps. Of course, now the Sun is shining, which makes this post sound completely stupid. But don't worry, simply reread it in thirty minutes. I promise it will be spot-on.

My Encounters with Movie Stars No. 1. - Meeting Hugh Grant

There are moments in life a woman never forgets: the moment she falls in love for the first time, the moment her child is born and the moment she sees the top of Hugh Grant's head for a brief second.


Finally, I'm able to tell that I had them all. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that is T-R-U-E! Seeing the top of the head of a famous British actor who was in Love Actually and Bridet Jones Diary has officially got checked off my bucket list. (To increase my chances I phrased it so that both Hugh Grant and Colin Firth would qualify. Cunning, right?)

Ready?

Ta-da!

Hugh Grant in the European Parliament, Brussels

It was taken by my husband and he was even luckier than me because he could see Hugh Grant's whole head.

So, what do you think?

Is my life glamorous or what?


(As you can see from the title, this post is meant to be the first instalment of a series. Based on the frequency I met movie stars you can expect the next one in 34 years.)

It's Officially One of Those Days

Those when the weird smell coming from your kitchen gets stuck in your nose even if you sniff your scented candles every time you pass them. Those when your favourite sweatpants are in the laundry and you have to wear the ones that are too short/tight/uncomfortable. Those when you know that accomplishing something is the only thing that would make you feel better, so you finally put that dirty tablecoth in the washing machine, and an hour later it comes out with the exact same stains. Those when you feel really unattractive, but then you imagine the number of bends you should perform in order to wash your hair, so you just sit down on the couch with a glass of wine and watch Californication.
At least I'm covered until naptime ends.

Eat Like the French

The other day I was in a restaurant and I almost finished my meal when I realized that what I thought to be a chunk of eggplant on my plate is actually a slug. A living one, hiding under a lettuce leaf. The dish that I ordered supposed to be vegetarian, so you can imagine how pissed I was.

In 'Blackadder Goes Forth' George teaches Baldrick how to keep a slug above his mouth to impersonate Charlie Chaplin  

How to Lose Hair&Alianate Our Kids

Apparently, sending five-year-old kids on a three-day-long class trip to the Ardennes is a highly recommended part of the Belgian curriculum because it helps them to develop self-confidence. It surely does, supposing that they survive it.

The one whom nothing could convince not to go...

I'm worried like hell, and also weeping over the fact the he is having his own fun that doesn't include me... It's just too soon...

City Boy Going to the Woods

Daniel in the woods without food

Me: We are going for a walk in the woods.
Son: Are we taking food with us?
Me: No.
Son: Then what is the point of going to the woods?

What I wore today (and why it didn't work)

So, this is what I wore today:

Question:
instead of looking like this

Photo: Vanessa Jackman

why on earth did I look like a lesbian female wrestler?? Was it the Converses or the backpack or the Converses plus the backpack?
Or should I just wash my hair?

Ellen Degeneres reads '50 Shades of Grey'

If I ever write a soft porn novel, I want Ellen Degeneres to read it for the audiobook version. This is hilarious!!

New hairstyle needed

As this is a post about hairstyles I feel obliged to include a picture of Jennifer Aniston, so here it is:

Ooops. My bad.

Let me try it again. There she goes:

So,
the thing is that I need a new haistyle. I avoid using the phrase cut my hair because last time I asked my hairdresser to cut my hair, the result freaked my husband out. My mom was the only one who liked my hair, which basically means that it sucked, and she was the only one who didn't want to hurt my feelings.
Actually, it turned out that the hairdresser and I had a little misunderstanding. I told to her that I wanted the same haistyle as one of the actresses in a TV show had.
To cut a long story short, it turned out that I had missed the last six months of the show during which period the actress went from a medium length to a short hairstlye.

Lesson? Be careful what you wish for because this can happen to you, too:

Phoebe screwing up Monica's hair because she confused Demi and Dudley Moore

Anyway, I think I will go for something like this.

It's easy-going, summery and I think my neither-curly-nor-straight hair will like it. Plus, I have some weird things going on my chin just like Olivia Wilde. That must be a sign!

Yes, I definitely like it!

Life with a Phil Dunphy

Monsieur: (randomly opening cupboard doors in the kitchen) Where do we keep the colander?
Me: Second cupboard from the left. (sighing) I don't know what you would do without me.
Monsieur: I would probably be playing on my PlayStation right now.

Phil Dunphy having an intimate moment with his iPad

Good to know that he has plans.

The way we live

Who's the geekiest of us all?
Monsieur has just finished watching a series of 33 youtube videos (appr. 4 hours). Apparently, some guy recorded as he was playing through all levels of a video game. And my husband watched it. Voluntarily.

Communication issues
During our highly cherised family meals our communication process looks like this one below, our kids being the form of secondary signals that obscure or confuse the signal carried aka the noise.

Therefore we have a new rule at the dining table. Kids are not allowed to talk unless they're in direct life danger.
And for the record, this doesn't count as life danger:

Who had lice first?
Every few weeks or so this warning appears on the front door of Daniel's (son no. 2) school.

It says 'the lices have returned' and I firmly believe that the word return is used for PR reasons only because they never really go away. 
Anyways, Marci (son no. 1) asked me how can you get lices. I said from another kid who has them. And how did that kid get them, he asked. From another kid who had them, I said.
Soon the conversation turned into a philosophical debate similar to the chicken or the egg causality dilemma.
And yes, we have lice.

I finally watched a movie: one day

Before the movie:

1. I hated Anne Hathaway

2. I never heard of Jim Sturgiss

3. I read the book and loved it

4. The twist in the end was totally 'OMG, DID THIS REALLY HAPPEN?'. I actually had to read it twice because I thought I had misunderstood it.

5. I'm a sucker for movies in which British people go to France. And by that I mean Love Actually because I can't think of anything else right now.

After the movie:

1. Anna Hathaway was an okay choice for Emma. Still don't like her.

2. Jim Sturgess was absolutely fantastic as Dexter. Very fine acting. Loved him. Period.

3. The movie was very good (I would say 7.5/10), but I definitely recommed reading the book first.

4. Even if I knew the twist would come, I went 'OMG!!!!!' again. It was pretty shocking.

5. Can I please move to French and write a book right now?

Besides, there were some very-very nice sets in the movie.

First of all Emma's place in Paris.

I know.

See no. 5 above.

I also liked Dexter's parents' bedroom.

GET OUT OF THE PICTURE WITH YOUR STUPID PANTS, DEXTER, YOU'RE RUINING THE SYMMETRY OF THE ROOM!

Note to self: get matching wallhangings above the bedside tables.

Awkward first post

After the glorious failure of my previous blog I decided to give this whole blogging thing another shot.

Read on and see if it's worth following.